Ok ok,
*Disclaimer: This Material is not intended for everyone. Stupid people, please turn back. Sensitive angels and all other bullshit should probably leave as well. If you read this article, its your responsibility and not mine. Any effort to blame the author shall and will only emphasise on the fact that you should read the second sentence of this disclaimer again and again and again.*
Well, recently a friend of mine attempted suicide. Well, its more like he attempted to attempt suicide. He called a few of us and said that the fishes in the sea were calling out to him and that wanted to go swimming in the sea indefinitely. I celebrated for a few days about his departure from my life of course. Then a few days later i see him back at work. It seems he got the flu and had to put off the swimming trip.
Everyone dies eventually, some just take more effort in making it happen at a time and way of their liking. And to be honest the success rates this suicides seem to be taking a dive.
I think the success rate of suicides run in parallel to the stupidity of the person trying. They go together in a Quadratic Curve chart. Take all suicide cases for a month and start plotting, and you will start seeing some really very stupid people. These are the people who should be hunted to extinction before they start spreading their S-Chromosome stupid gene. In depth analysis about how the S-Chromosome will be discussed in future articles.
I’m not really into telling people what to do, more so telling people how to die. But seriously, sometimes there are things that i just can’t comprehend.
The thing I don’t understand about people who attempt suicide is when for some reason they don’t die, that’s it. They stop trying. Why don’t they just keep trying? What’s changed? Is their life any better now? No. In fact, it’s worse, because now they’ve found out here’s one more thing they suck at.
And that’s why these people don’t succeed at life to begin with. Most people are made out to be losers by their attitude or their societies but some are just born one. They give up too easy. I say, pills don’t work? Try a rope. Drowning not helping? Try a shark or a sting-ray. There’s nothing more rewarding than reaching a goal you’ve set for yourself.
Cheers
ps: Those of you who want me to be more sensitive, please stuff a sock up yours
Technorati tags: Archtomato, Stupid People