| If They Do Go Either Way, They’re Usually Fake Visualised by archtomato On Wednesday, March 26, 2008 at 13:29 Hrs | Minimum B.S. Ok ok, Well that’s it, I give up. I really don’t know what the women are thinking. I can’t figure out any of them. Neither the tough cookies nor the cry babies or the sweet things that end up getting married to assholes. And the lesbians, lets not even get to the lesbians. God, the lesbians …. I’ve talked with them (the women that is). I’ve criticized them, I have asked them to criticize me, I’ve tried to kindle their manly side, I’ve tried to rekindle my feminine side, I’ve studied them. I’ve asked them to study me. And I have to admit I am still at square one. Not that I really object to square one. It is the only numbered square in the game. At least you know your position. Nobody ever screws up and goes, “Well, back to oval seven.” I believe we’re all secretly happy we can’t figure our relationships out. It keeps our minds working. I think we have to be grateful for the one thing in our lives that keeps us from being totally focused on eating. Eating is not a bad thing, its a good thing, as long as you don’t see your bathroom scale jump 2 markers up or people trying to cut you down, mistaking you for an oak tree. Cheers. ps: All lesbians are free to sign up for my ongoing study cum research program. Technorati tags: Archtomato, If They Do Go Either Way, They’re Usually Fake 3 Tomatoes Squashed • Throw a Tomato • Category: Ageless |
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| Shoes, Hats, Pickle Jar Lids Visualised by archtomato On Saturday, March 22, 2008 at 17:45 Hrs | Minimum B.S. Ok ok, It is true that theater tickets make great gifts. However, I don’t recommend buying theater tickets as gifts, I recommend buying gift certificates, and letting the gift recipient choose their own performance, date, time and seats. This is for a variety of reasons, mainly that tickets are always non-refundable and non-exchangeable. However, attending the theater is an event that I consider of personal sanctity, one for which a theatergoer should adapt their schedule, wardrobe and behavior, not unlike visiting a religious sanctuary. I don’t believe you would want to wear your yellow boots and red tights from work to watch 1000 camels in the theater. You can’t just press theater seats on someone and except it to be the right thing for them. Unless of course that someone is a gay gorilla that is sitting in your living room making lewd eye gestures at you that no one but you can see. You get the point. Essentially, here’s a good rule of thumb and yeah let’s not get started about why the thumb is used to measure a rule, its feminist by nature and just plain weird. Anyways back to the topic, whether it’s pants, theater seats, or chocolate pudding, or even an underwear from the US webby now that the greenback is down, anything your butt goes into should be selected by the end user. That is all. Cheers. ps: how does one fit 1000 camels in a stage … Technorati tags: Archtomato, Time for Sharing No Tomatoes Squashed • Throw a Tomato • Category: Ageless |
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| The Salmon Under My Sweater Visualised by archtomato On Monday, March 10, 2008 at 9:14 Hrs | Minimum B.S. Ok ok,
With the mundane routine in our lives - work, play, eat sleep continuum subtly guiding our lives, i think sometimes we refuse to see the new things that happen everyday. What I've learned so far: 11. No two things can exist at the same place at same time, it creates a Paradox.
No Tomatoes Squashed • Throw a Tomato • Category: Ageless O and by the way, i overheard this riddle in the bus. And like hell i cant get an answer. Any suggestions? "I have no mother and no father and was born without skin. I made a noise at birth and haven't made a sound since. Who am I?" So what have you learned today? Cheers |
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